Antipop - It's humpably good.

DanWatch2000.

Find Dan Now!
These are the logs on my conversations that have taken place during my tireless search for Dan. I've taken on the identify of "D00d-123" in hopes to blend in with the regulars.

Suspect Number 1: sugar_lips

I began my search in #nocu. My first interrogation was with a chatter under the alias "sugar_lips". She did not live up to her name, however. More like "idiot_Bitch_lips", if you ask me.

Session Start: Tue Jul 18 11:22:39 2000
<sugar_lips> D00d-123 asl
<D00d-123> No thanks, I'm on business.
<sugar_lips> i just asked sorry
<D00d-123> It's ok
<sugar_lips> hi i thought u were on business
<D00d-123> I am on busniess.
<D00d-123> And you're going to help me.
<sugar_lips> well what do u want
<sugar_lips> i guess
<D00d-123> You're going to tell me where Dan is.
<sugar_lips> i dont know him
<D00d-123> I didn't ask if you know him.
<D00d-123> Tell me where he is.
<sugar_lips> you r weird
<sugar_lips> shut up
<sugar_lips> if i dont know him how can i tell u where he is
<sugar_lips> DUH!!!!!!
<D00d-123> Don't you DUH me.
<D00d-123> I am no fool.
<sugar_lips> well leave me alone
Session Close: Tue Jul 18 11:26:54 2000

So, I left her alone. I figured I would get nothing out of her broken English.

But THEN...

Session Start: Tue Jul 18 11:27:18 2000
Session Ident: sugar_lips (nsonline@=VBgfik-206-03-95-16.tys.bellsouth.net)
<sugar_lips> duh
Session Close: Tue Jul 18 11:27:25 2000

Ouch.

Suspect Number 2: Melanie

Next under the light was Melanie. This Melanie character is one large container of sass. No respect for anyone but herself.

Session Start: Sat Jul 15 17:51:56 2000
<D00d-123> Where is Dan?
<Melanie> who is dan
<D00d-123> You know who Dan is. Don't play stupid with me.
<Melanie> wtf
<D00d-123> Wtf indeed.
<Melanie> Riiight
<D00d-123> There is only one I in the word "Right"
<D00d-123> I've had enough of your insolence.
<D00d-123> Just tell me what you know about Dan's locations, and all will be well.
Session Close: Sat Jul 15 18:06:42 2000

Not much of a talker. The "Silent Treatment" had been placed upon me. Not much you can do about that.

Suspect Number 3: Boty

Shaken, but not stirred, I continued on. Oddly enough, this character approached me after I asked, quote: "Where is Dan?" in #nocu. Here's what followed:

Session Start: Sat Jul 15 17:15:36 2000
Session Ident: Boty (david@63.239.231.T839=)
<Boty> told me about Dan (D00d-123 wants you to know: Dan is probably an *******)
<D00d-123> What?
<Boty> it has been said that What is <reply>
<D00d-123> I only speak english,
<Boty> excuse me?
<D00d-123> But Dan is brazilian.
<Boty> ...but dan is an *******..
<D00d-123> I'm sorry, but dan is not an ********
<Boty> gotcha.
<D00d-123> You got nothing.
<Boty> what?
<D00d-123> What what?
<Boty> i think what is <reply>
<D00d-123> <reply>?
<Boty> d00d-123: i haven't a clue
<D00d-123> Haven't a clue about what?
<Boty> d00d-123: i haven't a clue
<D00d-123> Listen, I don't have time for your games.
<Boty> sorry...
<D00d-123> You'd better be sorry.
<Boty> i'm not following you...
<D00d-123> You and me both, kid.
<Boty> i'm not following you...
<D00d-123> Ok.
<Boty> what?
<D00d-123> Where is Dan.
<Boty> no idea, d00d-123
<D00d-123> I don't believe you.
<Boty> sorry...
<D00d-123> This is going nowhere.
<Boty> ...but this is better than nothing, I guess......
<Boty> told me about dan (D00d-123 wants you to know: it has been said that dan is an *******)
<D00d-123> You are of NO help to me.
<Boty> ...but boty is a bot..
<D00d-123> GOOD FOR BOTY
<Boty> excuse me?
<D00d-123> Maybe you need the entire story.
<Boty> excuse me?
<D00d-123> I said Maybe you need the entire story.
<Boty> sorry...
<D00d-123> Ok.
<Boty> excuse me?
<D00d-123> I said Maybe you need the entire story.
<Boty> sorry...
<D00d-123> I dislike you.
<Boty> sorry...
<D00d-123> Monkeys say sorry...
<Boty> sorry...
<D00d-123> Woohoo!
<Boty> huh?
<D00d-123> Nevermind that.
<Boty> i'm not following you...
<D00d-123> You're kinda thick, Boty.
<Boty> i'm not following you...
<D00d-123> I'm not suprised, to tell the truth.
<Boty> i'm not following you...
<D00d-123> There's a shocker.
<Boty> excuse me?
<D00d-123> I said There's a shocker.
<Boty> what?
<D00d-123> Forget it. I still need to give you the story.
<Boty> I didn't have anything matching it. i still need to give you the story
<D00d-123> I'll be giving the story here, mack.
<Boty> i'm not following you...
<D00d-123> I haven't said anything worth following yet.
<Boty> sorry...
<D00d-123> Ok then.
<Boty> what?
<D00d-123> Forget it.
<Boty> D00d-123: I forgot it
<D00d-123> Good.
<Boty> sorry...
<D00d-123> Anyway the story is as follows:
<Boty> gotcha.
<D00d-123> Don't interupt.
<Boty> huh?
<D00d-123> Shut up, I'm giving you the story.
<Boty> i'm not following you...
<D00d-123> I retract my statement of disliking you.
<Boty> excuse me?
<D00d-123> I hate you.
<Boty> i'm not following you...
<D00d-123> Ok.
<Boty> huh?
<D00d-123> Kids.
<Boty> excuse me?
<D00d-123> Ok. Dan, the leader and supreme ruler of http://antipop.4mg.com, has disappeared. I need to find him. Do you have any idea where he is?
<Boty> i don't know, d00d-123
<D00d-123> Why didn't you say that in the first place?
<Boty> i haven't a clue, d00d-123
<D00d-123> Why must you torture me like this?
<Boty> i haven't a clue, d00d-123
<D00d-123> Ok.
<Boty> sorry...
<D00d-123> One more thing.
<Boty> huh?
<D00d-123> If you're gay, say sorry...
<Boty> sorry...
<D00d-123> Woo! Score another one for the human!
<Boty> one is mailto:Rinoa_f13@hotmail.com and the other is mailto:naughty_lil_angel13@hotmail.com
<D00d-123> Excellent. Thanks for the lead.
<Boty> de rien
<D00d-123> Of course…
<Boty> excuse me?
<D00d-123> Those two addresses should help, no?
<Boty> Two is better then nothin matty lol
<D00d-123> Matty?
<Boty> Matty is NOT a girl lol
<D00d-123> No kidding.
<Boty> excuse me?
<D00d-123> Tell me more about this Matty
<Boty> excuse me?
<D00d-123> Argh.
<Boty> sorry...
<D00d-123> lol
<Boty> lol is laughing out loud
<D00d-123> No shit?
<Boty> d00d-123: i haven't a clue

Since this discusion, I've been given reason to believe that Boty is, infact, not human.

I hate robots.

Suspect Number 4: The Damaged.Net Administration

#Nocu is on Damaged.Net. That's where I found all of my suspects. Also, Dan is a #studio64 veteran, and the Damaged.Net Administration have always had a thing against #studio64 users. Perhaps it was the fact that the better part of them could at least read at a 6th grade level, or maybe because the #studio 64 users didn't want to live under constant observation and moderation. Whichever the case may be, I decided to take my mission straight to the heart of the monster...

Session Start: Tue Jul 18 19:47:39 2000
*** Now talking in #Services
*** Topic is 'Welcome to the Damaged.net Services help channel. Please state your problem then let us answer it. Dont idle. and please dont stay here for no reason. We DO NOT SUPPORT BOTS! Sorry'
*** Set by Vengeance on Fri Jul 14 14:46:32
<D00d-123> Mister and Missus IRCops. My friend Dan seems to have misplaced himself, and I am on a mission to track him down. I know he frequents this server, so I thought you might have some ideas. As much as I would like to, I'm not going to hold DrAgOn directly responsible. Given your large amount of power, I would like to ask you to help me.
<D00d-123> I'm sure you folks have some sort of IRCop command that tells you the exact location of anyone in the world, right?
<DrAgOn> No
<D00d-123> Well.
<D00d-123> I am shocked an amazed.
<D00d-123> Thank you for your time, ladies and gents.
<DrAgOn> not our job to takc every one
<DrAgOn> no prob
<D00d-123> Yes, that would be a fairly tough job, considering the lot of you can hardly spell.
<D00d-123> Goodbye then.
Session Close: Tue Jul 18 19:50:02 2000

Well, the way I see it, it's obvious that DrAgOn and his cronies has abducted Daniel Dias, an innocent child. Only God knows what they are doing to his poor soul at this very moment.

And maybe it was yellow bellied of me to insult the IRCop's intelligence(or lack thereof) and flee before I could be punished, but I don't think anyone is really upset about it, do you?

AntiPOp Box
This is where you can send your letters, comments, questions, death threats, love letters, etc. and, if it pleases us, we'll post it, answer it or whatever. If not, we'll laugh at it and use it as toilet paper. All you have to do is send it to us at antipop@antipop.4mg.com or use the fancy form below, and we'll see about it.

It's not their job to takc every one.

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