We all know that a chain is only as strong as it's weakest link, and thusly, a nation is only as strong as it's leader. Let's compare the head of each country:

We'll begin with Clinton, even though he is on the right, and traditionally, the item on the left would go first, unless you live in Japan. But I run things however I fucking want to around here, got it? Good.

We see Clinton here in his white-collar (yes, I know the shirt is blue) uniform. He sports well-kept salt and pepper hair, a clean shaven mug, and baby blue eyes. Add all of this to that big dopey smile, and you get a big southern fruit.

Now take a gander at Castro. Grasping his hands and raising them in a victory of some kind, no doubt. He's got a tough looking scruffy beard, and big evil looking eyebrows. He even wears a military uniform. If I was a leader of a country, I wouldn't give any shit to someone that wore a military uniform all the time. Besides, he'd probably put his cigar out in my eye if I started talking junk.

With Clinton being the president of the majority(66%) of Antipop's staff's country, we can't have him looking soft next to his enemies. Clinton needs to toughen up, and I have developed an eight step plan that will do just that.

Step #1: Castro has a military look to him, and that's part of what makes him look so damn tough. Every good military has weapons, so why not Clinton?

Step #2: All those tough mobster stereotypes on TV smoke cigars, and that's just the kind of image of Clinton we need to convey to those dirty commies. I know Clinton already had a negative run-in with cigars, but the American people are stupid enough to forget all about that a few days after Jay Leno stopped making the same joke about it in his monologue.

Step #3: Thirdlywise, I mentioned Castro's scruffy beard before. With this "I don't give a damn about my looks, I just want to kill some commies" facial accessory, Cuba is bound to stop fucking with him.

Step #4: Uhh, on second thought, let's lose the beard.

Step #5: No, no, the beard works.

Step #6: You know? I like Castro's hat too.

Step #7: Some nice shades will help keep him looking cool and mysterious, not to mention protect from those nasty UV rays.

Step #8: And last, but not least, Castro's Army Green uniform is what really gives him that high level of intimidation.

And there you have it folks. Only 8 steps to a newer, tougher, less shit-taking president. And if this fails, I guess he could pick up a few bucks at the circus as a pimping-terrorist-drug lord-leprechaun.

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