And there you have it! So incredibly easy, it's used worldwide by poser teens and adults everywhere! All ages can enjoy this. But just in case you missed as it can happen to best of us fakers, just wash the mark off your wrist with soap and water and start all over again. Afterall, we want the SlasherStyles stencil to bring you the attention your deprived life needs.

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THE MANY COLORS

     Does the SlasherStyles stencil not match your outfit? Not go well with your haircut? Not rebellious enough for you? Well, we can help there! We offer MANY colors for you to choose from! Here is just a small sample of shades your SlasherStyles stencil is available in:

Your satisfaction is our satisfaction and so much more.

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FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS

      We know that you have questions about our product and service to you. It's not every day that you find something this good to be true but it is so very much true. Questions that may be going through your mind:

Q: How is this supposed to convince my friends that I really am depressed and have them feel sorry for me?
A: We make a stencil and felt tipped marker so advanced, that your friends would have to really look at your wrist for atleast five seconds to see that it's not really a cut. It's been found that most people stop staring after three seconds. This is a highly useful device.

Q: What if this goes too far and my parents put me in a mental hospital?
A: You'd have to have mental problems to try this product in the first place.

Q: When it rains outside, the colored in slash on my wrist won't fade, will it?
A: Absolutely not! There is 87.65 percent quality put into the SlasherStyles stencil and quite frankly, we're offended you'd think such of a thing. You need soap and water to make it fade away.

Q: I bought one of your stencils and I thought it'd be easy to just color in the little slot with a marker, but I just couldn't do it. Faking a suicide attempt is such a big step. Any suggestions?
A: We will soon have a hotline for SlasherStyles support to frightened individuals such as yourself who cannot color in that slot.

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PRICES AND ORDERING

     Now that you want to buy our stencil we have the deal of a lifetime to offer you. One stencil is $9.95 BUT wait! If you order two, you'll get the third one free*! Not to mention that this includes two felt tipped red markers and a rubber band! What's the hurry? You won't look like just a poser anymore!

To order, send your Name, Age, Color preference, Quantity of stencils, Street Address City, State, Zip Code, Country
Send it all to:

SlasherStyles
3174 Crastlebury Lane
Lorenzi, CA 90219
*Shipping and handling is $16.71 for the third stencil.

Dan: Also perfect for killing fat kids you don't like and acquaintaces who are lately getting on your nerves.

Freddie Mercury rolls in grave.
Dan: Sung to Queen's "Bohemian Rapsodhy", that kick ass song whose original lyrics can be found here.

Viagra Apology
Daniel Dias

Is this the real life?
Or is it just a porn flick?
Caught in your panties.
No escape from pregnancy.
Spread out your labias,
Do the same with your thighs and you'll see
I may be just a little boy, but I have my necessities
Even though I easily cum, I easily do
It stays a lot high and too little low
Even if you don't blow me
It doesn't really matter you'll see
you'll see

Mama, just raped a chick
Pulled my pants off and my briefs
Did the same with her panties and it slid it in
Mama, the erection had just begun
But then I went and cummed it all away
Mama, ooo
Didn't mean to make her cry
But it's not my fault if I got it in the wrong hole
She said "carry on, carry on"
Vaseline doesn't really matter.

Too late, it was too early to cum
It sent shivers down my spine,
She said it was aching all the time
Now goodbye everybody, I've got to go
I forgot to wear the rubber now she's pregnant
Mama, ooo (I told her she should just have blown)
I don't want no kid
I sometimes wish that bitch had taken the pill

I see a little penis of a man
Holy shit, holy shit, how do you even find that in your pants
With tweezers and lots of accuracy, it's a very very tiny thing
That's pathetic, that's pathetic
That's pathetic, that's pathetic
that's pathetic - we should all point and laugh at you

But I'm just a poor boy, can't help if my penis isn't big
He's just a poor boy, with a tiny dick
Let's help him make his penis size a monstrosity
I also easy cum, you know - will you help me so?
Hell yeah! We will help you so - help him so
Hell yeah! We will help you so - help him so
Hell yeah! We will help you so - help me so
We will help you so - help me so (we will)
Help you so - Help me so
Help you so - ooo
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Oh mama mia, mama mia, mama mia they'll help me so
Show that bitch now man, we have a viagra put aside for you
for you
for you

So you think you can blow me and spit it in my eye? Take this bitch, it's so big you'll choke on and die
"OH BABY, I'm gonna choke on that baby"
"Please get it out - Please get it right out of me."

OH YES OH YES
Nothing ever fails now
It just flows like a river
Nothing really fails now - Nothing really fails now on me

Anyways, time for another blow...

Dan: Is that catchy or what?

It's that time of the day
Time to open the Antipop mail, and see what our readers have to say.

How long will i slide? ive gotta take it on the other side...,...beat me on the other side... - Dave
Dan: Making a parody for a song just to put it on a website, you loser have you got no life at all?

God bless that Pepsi girl. For years she has brought the USA with entertaining commercials of that little cutesy satanic voice of hers. Not to mention that I also get warm fuzzy feelings when she says "pepsi please." - Amber
Dan: I couldn't help but notice the lesbianism hidden in that message.

Special?!? HOLY SHIT! Maybe you could show up in Project No Dongs Allowed 2000. - The Zero
Dan: I'm not sure, but keep in touch when Project Only Thongs Allowed comes up.

Barry the Angry Barcode scares me. Please hold me. - Lupus
Dan: Mush's twisted mind created that, before he betrayed us for the blank page which I will not link this time just because of that.

We love you, Jeff. Some in a sexual way, others just as a friend. You make the judgement call. - Squeo
Dan: I'm jealous.

I is for the way you like to be in porn
N is for the smell of a fresh day of spring
K is for the cute nose you have on your face
Y is for the way i have to clean up your feacies every sunday
- Dave
Dan: Yes, of course we all remember INKY the porn star cat.

Make fun of a kid named Nick Gupta in your next update, please. He's some guy who was hitting on my girlfriend. That, or shoot him in the face. - Squeo
Dan: If your girlfriend was even remotely interested in another guy it's because you didn't touch her clit with a moistened finger. Don't let that ever happen again and remember: touch her finger with a wet clit and she'll be yours forever.

nis sight lol u ruel
lmao im not drank i promse- Vato_Loco
Dan: Yeah, you're probably not drunk. There's a great chance you aren't.

Will you make love to me? - Mage
Dan: Silly question.

Every night I get on mIRC.
Don't expect true beauty to restrain itself.
Golly, the Brazilian sure can shake it.
Even without being MBJ, Dan achieves the infinite funny. -JonoD
Dan: Aww thanks. No rhyme or metric, I like it how you went for that modernist style.

I WANNA SEX YOOUUU UPPPPPPP, I WANNA SEX YOU UP, OH YEAH SEX YOU UP LIKE MY COOOOCCCCCKKKKKK.(original song written by yours truely) - WeIrDnEsSnEsS
Dan: Will that be in your new CD, mr. Waters?

Guilty Parties
People that "helped" with this update: Dan Burrito, the Prodigous Amber, a talking Wolksvagen.